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Author Topic: Got this in an e-mail...  (Read 981 times)

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Dave-C

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Got this in an e-mail...
« on: 05 November 2007, 20:37:25 »

"I have a big dog & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I woke up in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices, and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my ar5e and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack: he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Silly Moo...........why else would I buy dog food??"

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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A380 Elite

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #1 on: 05 November 2007, 21:02:35 »

Hi Dave,

Verdict still out on the carin up date disk.

I think it's a bit quicker, more test's being done.
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Tony H

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #2 on: 05 November 2007, 21:17:13 »

Quote
"I have a big dog & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I woke up in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices, and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my ar5e and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack: he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Silly Moo...........why else would I buy dog food??"

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Brilliant ;D ;D ;D
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Golfbuddy

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #3 on: 05 November 2007, 22:52:21 »

That was a bit ruff.  ;D
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Danny

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #4 on: 05 November 2007, 23:37:50 »

heard this one a while back, pretty good :D
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raximax

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #5 on: 06 November 2007, 01:18:38 »

that was a shane on her  ;D
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mmeeggaa

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #6 on: 06 November 2007, 09:09:03 »

Quote
that was a shane on her  ;D

With puns like that, your likely to have your collie felt by the admins.  ::)
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ians

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #7 on: 06 November 2007, 14:24:19 »

Hopefully this is the tail end of this thread.
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Jimbob

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Re: Got this in an e-mail...
« Reply #8 on: 06 November 2007, 14:29:52 »

Dave, you're Barking mad  ;D
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